come along with me

Instead I am tossing and turning in bed. I'd blame the coffee I had late in the afternoon, but this sleeplessness is most likely over my excitement for this blog. Though, to be honest, I've been dealing with an early morning bedtime for months now, sometimes sleeping as late as 5 AM, so this insomnia can't be due to just caffeine and enthusiasm. It's not good, I know. In fact this is probably detrimental to my overall health. But I can't help it; something about the late night/early morning calls to me, energizes me. This is the time when I am most motivated to create. I get into the zone to write and draw and journal most often in the dark of the night, the wee hours of the morning — probably because, by then, all my work is done for the day, and everyone else is asleep. No one is awake to ask me to do something. Nothing is pressing. Nothing is urgent. It's just me and my creations.  The only price I pay is the dark circles under my eyes, and that I always wake...

When Hayley Williams released her album Ego Death at a Bachelorette Party last year, there was one song that jumped out at me: "Mirtazapine", her ode to her antidepressant medication. The chorus, in particular, is very relatable: Here come my genie in a screwcap bottle To grant me temporary solace I could never be without her I had to write a song about her Who am I without you now? Mirtazapine You make me eat, you make me sleep Mirtazapine You let me dream, you let me dream I did not take mirtazapine and am no longer currently on SSRIs; still, this song magnified my appreciation for my own medication. Its release is very timely, considering that this year marks a decade of my being on medication for bipolar disorder. Well, to be specific, I was on antidepressants for depression first, then switched to antipsychotics once my psychiatrist diagnosed me with bipolar disorder.  Needing to be on medication used to scare me. It meant that there was something wrong with me, somethin...

Ever since I was a child, I knew that I wanted to be hunched over a desk, writing about nothing in particular.  On a notebook, writing is easy. I just had to find a quiet space, and then, pen and notebook in hand, write down everything plaguing my little heart and mind. Sometimes my hand cramps. Sometimes my pen runs out of ink. Always, eventually, I run out of pages. Then, it would be time to archive my notebook in a huge plastic box, where it would collect dust. But then, who would be able to read these journals, when they're all hidden away? And who would be able to decipher the looping cursive mess of my handwriting? After all, what is a writer without anyone to read what they've written? The moment I discovered the Internet and the wonderful world of blogging, I accepted that I would spend the rest of my life writing for and running one (or more!) blogs. I didn't know what I would be blogging about; I just knew that I was meant to be a blogger.  At the time, there was ...

I've been journaling since high school. I won't tell you what year I started, but let's just say that it's been about two decades of consistent, near-daily entries. There are exceptions to that consistency, of course; some years just don't have much going for them. 2025 was one of those years, even though a lot happened.  I want to say that it's because I didn't like the notebook I used: it was a daily planner, with a budget tracker and prompts, which made it too structured for me. I need space to play! I need a few empty pages where I can pour my heart out without any confines! Looking at all my old journals and diaries, I wrote way more in a plain old notebook than I ever did on daily planners. So, knowing this... tell me why, when I went to Muji, I bought one of their daily planners for 2026. (It was because the planner was on sale. And it was cute, and I wanted it.) I've had it for a month now (it started in December 2025), and I'm already a few ...